Since my rant the other week, I've been way more positive. I feel like I have accepted what is happening with my body now and I'm focused on trying to maintain what I already have.
Today I went to hospital for a check up and had some unexpected good news (no I'm not pregnant lol). For the first time in years my lung function has gone up after being discharged from hospital. Today was FEV1 62% and FVC 92%! I know the FEV1 has only gone up up by 3% but every little helps plus I am in the 60's, which is way better than being in the 50's!! My oxygen levels were 97% too, which is high for me :D
Also I was so surprised to hear that the new bug that I had, Serratia has gone! When I first got told I had it, back in 2012, the docs thought I would be stuck with it for life like with the pseudomonas. Thanks to those tiger IVs (never learnt the actual name lol) it has been defeated! Of course there is a big chance it will come back, but for now at least it has gone and it is reassuring to know that it CAN be eradicated from my lungs.
Now the PEG... I felt soooooo awful telling the doctor this seeing as I had been nagging on at them for years to let me have one... but ever since the chat with the surgeon I have been having second thoughts. Having the PEG is quite a big decision as it is there for life and I will permanently have a tube coming out of me. I know that it will probably be a necessity eventually, but I knew that if I didn't give all the supplements just one more go I'd regret it forever! So that's what I'm going to do, along with actually doing some proper exercise, I'm hoping I will put on weight and bulk up a bit lol.